Teenagers Know Everything

And to this day I still think that is a valid expression, despite the sarcasm with which my parents used to say that to me..

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So now my semi-extended family includes several teenage girls and they are the funniest, most gorgeous, mood-lifting Angels that ever walked the earth. Lucky. When I was a teenager I was moody, awkward as all hell, not to mention 3 feet taller than all my friends. I guess the difference now is that it is more expected for teenagers to dress beyond their years which is a little sad to me, but I guess they will have way less embarrassing photos to look back on.

Most teenage girls I meet are fascinated in hair, beauty, and makeup and latch on as soon as they find out I have some insider tips. Seeing as my routine consisted of foundation and ringed black eyeliner, most teenagers seem to have advanced way beyond me but nonetheless here’s a few pointers for you young spring chickens, or any you may know.

Body Basics

Please shave. As soon as hair starts growing where it wasn’t before, legs and underarms are a must. And it is hella easier than waxing despite how trendy as some girls try to make that out.

Eyebrows – probably the first thing that irritated me as I slowly became more self aware was my bushy eyebrows, ask to have them shaped for your birthday or whatever by a professional and then simply tweeze that line of hair as they start to grow back – but for the love of God do not over tweeze because they will never grow back. Never….

Deoderant. Every day. Antiperspirant. Even if you can’t smell yourself, other people can. On top of that, if you’re lucky enough to have some, my mother told me that women should wear perfume every day without fail. This inspired comments like “my god you always smell so good!” from about the age of 17.

Wash your hair every second day please, no less, no more unless you have been super sweaty from some kind of sport that I never bothered playing. Washing every second day controls the oils without stripping your hair.

Makeup stuff! The fun bit! Start out with either just a concealer where you need it, or a tinted moisturiser. Wait til people are used to seeing you with that before you attempt a foundation to avoid teasing from siblings and parents.

Do not over bronze. If you fake tan, fine but always only go one to two shades darker (hopefully with one of my recommended tans) and leave the bronzer overload at home. Just a dusting on cheekbones and temples please.

Until you are 18 with the exception of special occasions, the only other items you should wear are a tinted lip gloss, and a swipe of mascara. A little blush providing you don’t go overboard and it suits your skin tone.

For the special nights out, go get your eyes done at a makeup counter whih is normally free and take mental notes so you can copy in future. Then if you like the look of a gel eyeliner or particular eyeshadow, go buy a cheaper version elsewhere – save your moolah. That is the single most important piece of advice I can give you.

And finally on hair: go nuts sugar, trust me, after the age of about 22, anything involving more than a ponytail or a straightener will seem like way too much effort.

Now go test all that out and take lots of (PG!!!!) photos so you can look back on your fine self when you start getting really old like me.

xx

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